A Scrub is a Guy Who Thinks He's Fly.....

Okay yeah, I'm aware these are not the real lyrics. But they might as well be. Every generation has them but we call them by different names. In the 2000's they were scrubs, before that they were Barney's, and before that… well before that, I don't really know.

What I do know is that they are a thing we deal with on the regular and no one is happy about it. Except maybe the fuck boys.

For those who do not know what a "fuck boy"** is there are a few different definitions depending on who is asked. (Thought Catalog has so nicely made a list of some explanations.) My personal favorite and go to "Fuck Boy" explanation is: "A manipulating dick who does whatever it takes to benefit him, regardless of who he screws over. They will screw over anyone and everyone as long they get what they want."

We all know one, hell we have probably all dated one…Hell... Some of us may have been one at one point. But the question is why do they exist? What is going on with us, as a whole, that we have this mentality?

The biggest reason Fuck Boys thrive is that as a society we have become numb to the idea of being honest about what we want out of relationships. We are expected to think that every person we are with could be "the one." In theory, it is to awesome to believe that the love of your life is out there somewhere. But we can't keep thinking EVERYONE could be that person. Fuck Boys know that the counterparts are looking to find someone to have a long-term relationship with- Problem is, their wants don't line up with that.

So instead of moving on to someone with similar interest and similar life goals, they play up the wants of that other person. They do this in order to get whatever it is they need out of the given situation. Once they get it, they are done. Leaving nothing but a trail of tears and empty Ben and Jerry's pints in their path. Or sometimes the whole thing blows up on them and they are discovered for the FuckBoy they are. Then they start to play stupid and act like the counterpart "misread/misheard what they were saying", "they were just trying to be nice" or the kicker " I just can't deal with drama"

Ladies and Gentlemen of the NonFuckBoy population: If your counterpart of whatever preferred gender states at any point " I just can't deal with drama" - Chance are he/she  only likes drama that they can cause and is most likely  a FuckBoy

We can't keep doing this "playing nice" shit. Or keep "telling people what they want to hear" just to get out of being honest with each other. Do people REALIZE how much more damage mind games have?  

HEY FUCKBOYS can you see how saying " I'm interested in you and want to see what happens, but it sucks because the timing is off" attached with CONSTANT flirting and kissing...is not letting someone down gently - it is being a fuck boy.

Can you see how being with someone and talking to them about the future and your lives together …. While fucking another girl because you are unhappy but don't want to hurt a person by leaving them… is not sparing their feelings. --- it is being a fuck boy.

I'm hoping by now you all can see the common themes emerging here.

For me when it comes to dating there is no need for these games, you either do it or you don't. You either like me or you don't. You either want to date, you don't want to date, or you just want to fuck.

Everything has options, and there is no reason to be coy about what they are. What is the real fucking point of playing games?  I personally feel like we could eliminate this whole "Fuck Boy" mentality but just being HONEST with one another about our wants and our needs from a person.

So guys and girls of the FuckBoy nature cut the shit, put on your big girl/boy panties and act like a decent human. Own up to your feelings, even if they might not get you what you want in that moment. You might be surprised, you could have the other person's intent completely wrong. You could get exactly what you hoped for just by being open with the person. Or you may get rejected and that is okay also. Just wait to find that next person who works with your goals for a "relationship" (however you define that)

What you can't do is keep walking around stomping on hearts and expecting to walk away looking like the good guy. Because you aren't- You know what it makes you.