Another year.. another blog.. another Adventure

I have heard people say we try to do more creative things when we are sad than when we are happy. If my stream of blogging patters shows anything, it is that this is a pretty accurate representation of my life.  I write when I'm sad, I write when I'm stressed and I write when I feel like I have no control over everything else in my life.

With that said- Hello interwebs- I'm hear for now and hopefully for longer than I usually stay.  So you may be thinking, what the heck brought you back. (ok- so there is probably no one reading this who is ACTUALLY thinking that- but humor me will you). Well dear internet friends, it is a tale as old as time. One I have lived through multiple times already (because we never learn do we). 

It goes like this- Girl has life that she really enjoys, Girl meets Boy... Boy meets Girl... Boy and Girl enjoy each other's company... They date, They fall in love, Girl becomes so wrapped up in the relationship she will do anything to make Boy happy.... Boy isn't happy, but never tells Girl... Boy pulls away... Boy stops coming home.. Boy starts acting strange. Girl get depressed.. Girl stops seeing her friends.. Stops doing even more of the things she loves.. Girl barely gets out of bed... Girl friend out about Mistress... Girl starts to blame herself.. Starts to wonder how she could have been a better girlfriend to Boy.. Girl starts to pick at her own self esteem until she becomes nothing but a shell of the person she was before.... 

And that brings you about up to date. So why a blog you ask- Because writing is the only way I know to get things out and stay sane all at once. This may be published- it may be in the interwebs for all eternity, someone may actually read it or even follow it.  But none of that is important ( I mean YOU follower/Reader-  if you're out there and exist- YOU are important).  The number of people reading this isn't why I created this blog. I created it to keep track of the things that have been going on- the emotions, the thoughts, the worries... but most importantly the adventures. 

I'm tired of being scared, sad and lonely. I'm tired of wondering how I can be better for a guy to love me. I'm tired of looking in the mirror and wanting to cry because I hate what I see. I'm tired of coming home and feeling like I have nothing to live for. 

A dibs has been called on 2017 to become "The Year of Yaasssss (within reason)" 

So welcome friends. I hope you enjoy the ride. It is going to be a roller coaster.